This is the year I turn 40...they say life begins at 40 so I thought why wait! What can I achieve in the next 6 months before my birthday?
This year is about unearthing myself. Peeling back the layers, the busy-ness that has become my reality. I hope that you come along on this journey of discovery with me.
My Mum, when I was a child/teen always encouraged me to write, since she passed away some 22 years ago (just after her 40th birthday) I've barely written but the urge has grown ever stronger over the past few years and my writing has begun to increase over the past 12 months. I have decided in her honour to write...write for you my friends, write for my girls, hopefully for their girls and their girls and write for anyone else who would like to read about my journey.
I'm a Mum through and through...I like to help everyone all the time, it's a hobby if not the reason I was put on this earth. When I'm not mothering my children or someone else's (I love having a house full of kids playing or sitting at my bench chatting while I cook for them, people think I'm mad but it's what I was put on this earth for) because my children are all at school now, I love to 'mother' my work (our businesses are my school hours babies) and sometimes my husband but I do try not to.
A new introduction to me...raw and real...take it or leave it...this is my journey...to rid myself of my old shell 🐚 and find a bigger better one to travel around with or cozy up in for a while. No more 'fake me' I will now feel the fear and do it anyway!
Self-development is my other hobby, constantly trying to do better and learn more, sometimes I'm a little obsessive but it's so exciting to me! I don't really tell many people about my self-development obsession because I've always feared judgement and ridicule but I think I have finally developed to a point of 'I am who I am...we fit or we don't' I feel brutal saying it but I think it's about time I grow up and leave those childhood fears behind!
There are really only a couple of people who really know me. People think that they know me but I guess I’m not alone in that I show certain sides of myself to certain people and hide those sides from others? I have been a certified people pleaser, too afraid to be real, always holding back my true self in fear of judgement or rejection and always making sure others only see the best of me. The part that I think I don’t hide so much is that I always have the best intentions, that I have a good heart, I love to help others, that I do truly care about people and choose to see the best in them or give them the benefit of the doubt. I generally always put my children and their friends first and that has been my purpose for the last 16 years and as the girls have grown and become more independent I’ve found myself in search of true friends and on a journey to find my new purpose...trying things on for size to see what fits...the revelation is that perhaps if I keep denying who I truly am how can I show up as the best example for my girls? Here’s to the next step...truth!
To follow me on this journey of discovery don't forget to sign up to check in here regularly and follow my social media pages. I look forward to hearing from you and hopefully getting to know you too.
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